Label Queen The Hallmark Episodes

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Foreign. Hello, everyone, and welcome back to Label Queen, the holiday edition. If you're following along, this is six episodes dedicated to roasting and toasting Hallmark holiday Christmas movies. I love them. My beautiful angel co host Lauren Kinchelo. [00:00:29] Speaker B: Hello. [00:00:29] Speaker A: Is a novice to these. She is a writer, a comedian and a producer. And she's along for the ride to basically recap all of these messes that we're getting ourselves into. I love that you have no relationship to these things. [00:00:44] Speaker B: I really don't. [00:00:46] Speaker A: And you're learning. [00:00:47] Speaker B: I am. I'm learning so much. [00:00:49] Speaker A: All right, so today we are recapping what I believe is also on the countdown to Christmas, which is a thing. This is a 2025. This is a new one. [00:01:01] Speaker B: Hot off the press. [00:01:02] Speaker A: Hot off the press, honey. It is called a Christmas Angel Match. This is a movie about two mismatched Christmas angels who are forced to team up to save the Christmas Connection department. The ccd. Is that what it is? The dcc. [00:01:20] Speaker B: Oh, this is the department of Christmas Connections. [00:01:22] Speaker A: It is. It is. It's the dcc. The angels, Monica and Michael must ensure a destined couple falls in love by Christmas Eve. All while dealing with their own clashing personalities and a growing spark between them. The stars are Megan Orie as Monica and Benjamin Iris as Michael Ayers, if I'm saying that correctly. Sorry as Michael. Here's the summary. Christmas, the dcc, the department of Christmas Connections. They're working for this department, but they're facing a threat of death downsizing due to the challenges of connecting people in the modern digital age. I want to stop there for one second. This pissed me off because I was like, okay, heaven, I can finally relax. But it turns out you have to work. [00:02:12] Speaker B: You really do. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And your job is in jeopardy. You're an angel, but you might not make these cuts right. [00:02:21] Speaker A: So even in heaven, we're forced to deal with deadlines, downsizing, office gossip, and all of the craziness that goes along with everyday corporate living. So that really bummed me. [00:02:35] Speaker B: I don't think I was going there, but now I don't even want to. [00:02:38] Speaker A: Thank you. Send me downstairs. [00:02:40] Speaker B: Yeah, I'll go down. [00:02:41] Speaker A: I'll get a tan. Okay. So the angels mission. As a last ditch effort, seasoned rule abiding Monica is unexpectedly paired with the younger. We'll talk about that. Younger, spontaneous and rule bending Michael. He's such a rebel. Their task is to ensure that a pair of human. They call them Tender Hearts. [00:03:00] Speaker B: Tender Hearts. [00:03:02] Speaker A: That was so creepy. [00:03:03] Speaker B: Didn't like that. [00:03:04] Speaker A: Tender Hearts named Daisy and Patrick fall in love before Christmas. They have opposing styles. Monica, who works strictly by the celestial rule book, clashes with Michael, who prefers a more spontaneous earthly methods like snowball fights and hot chocolate. He also talks about fun nonstop. There's a developing romance. As they work together, Monica and Michael find themselves drawn to each other. Their undeniable chemistry. It was pretty deniable, honestly. Complicates their matchmaking mission and causes them to question their own heavenly rules. And then as Christmas Eve approaches, the pair worry that their differences will keep them from succeeding. That's so corporate. However, a surprising twist leads us to a holiday connection no one saw coming. [00:03:51] Speaker B: Oh, no one. [00:03:52] Speaker A: No one saw this coming. [00:03:53] Speaker B: Nobody saw. [00:03:55] Speaker A: Including the two angels themselves. Lauren Kinchelo. What? My angel. By the way, great wardrobe for this. [00:04:04] Speaker B: Oh, thank you. I want a job at the dcc. And this is, I believe it's on point. [00:04:09] Speaker A: You have to work really hard. You have to earn your wings. [00:04:12] Speaker B: You do have to earn your wings. [00:04:13] Speaker A: First of all, what did you think of a Christmas angel match? [00:04:16] Speaker B: Well, I was glad after last week's episode that we were launched back into like total bananas. Like what? Like almost psychedelically weird. I, I, I did, I did like that. I missed that in the, the last. [00:04:32] Speaker A: One we did, this one was pretty madcap and, and insane. And I will say because I'm starting to believe probably in the last two years all of these things are written by AI and Chat GPT. [00:04:42] Speaker B: Are they? [00:04:43] Speaker A: I think so now I think what's really happening is they're just keep throwing things on to the Chat GPT. So there's so much here that there's just a lot to unpack. Let's begin. We start on a magical bridge. So already there's a flashback. There's a woman in a cloak and a sort of handsome man on a horse. And what if she drops something? Right. [00:05:08] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:05:09] Speaker A: Surely she dropped like her carpet bag and the handsome gentleman picks it up. They have nothing to do with the story. Just to say we're going back in time. And we get a glimpse of Monica from who's on the bridge with her quill pen. [00:05:24] Speaker B: She's behind it all. [00:05:25] Speaker A: She's behind it all. She is the architecture of getting these tender hearts together. [00:05:30] Speaker B: She's the master of the meet cute. [00:05:32] Speaker A: Yes. Thank you. And it's always on this bridge. There's another one with a broken down truck that looks like it's from the 50s or something. [00:05:39] Speaker B: That's a covered bridge. [00:05:40] Speaker A: It's a covered bridge. [00:05:42] Speaker B: Point AF point. [00:05:43] Speaker A: Yep. And there she is. With her feather quilt pen. Again, the crappiest. [00:05:47] Speaker B: Like Michael's pet. This thing is a piece of garbage. It's from het. And they, like, plucked it off of Boa. [00:05:56] Speaker A: Yeah. And she's very clearly happy with herself, right? [00:06:00] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. Things were smug, even. [00:06:02] Speaker A: Smug. Cocky and smug. And I don't like her right away. Plus, she's in everybody's business. All right, we fast forward to modern times. And she's in a cafe, you know, and all of a sudden we get this camera pan. And what's so crazy about this scene? Everyone is on their devices. What that means, Lauren, is, you know, technology bad right away. Because we are not going to look up from our device to make a connection. [00:06:38] Speaker B: That's right. And the angel can throw a magical fireball at you. But if you're on Grindr, you're not gonna feel it. [00:06:47] Speaker A: I don't think any of these people. There might have been one. There might have been one on Grindr, but they're all on their devices. IPads, computers, phones. No one is connecting. [00:06:57] Speaker B: And it is kind of an accurate coffee, I have to say. It is what it looks like at the coffee shop. Laptops. [00:07:03] Speaker A: Not only the coffee shop. That's bars, that's library. Like, that's at school. That is everything. So, yes, they did get this right, but they really sort of like, it's a little ham fisted. She goes to make a connection between this. I think it's Daisy and Patrick, and lo and behold, the device gets in the way and she just. She doesn't have it anymore. [00:07:24] Speaker B: Yeah, he's about to bump into her and she will then spill her coffee. But bleep, bleep. And he turns the wrong way and does not, in fact, spill her coffee. [00:07:33] Speaker A: You know what this movie should have been called? The Meet Cute Mishaps. I think I would have tuned in right away. Like the Meet Cute Mishaps. I like that. Okay, we go to the office in. We're assuming heaven. Explain the office to everybody. [00:07:51] Speaker B: It's like the conference room at A La Quinta. Everything's white. Feel that. That's where our. This is heaven. [00:08:00] Speaker A: It's heaven. Everyone's in white. There's a lot of dry ice, so they're sort of walking on a cloud. I was not mad at that effect. I was like, okay, if you're gonna put some money somewhere, put it in the dry ice. [00:08:12] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it worked. [00:08:13] Speaker A: I love the smoke and mirrors. So then we meet the angels. We go to the office. I think of Gabriel, his name. That's Like a lead angel. [00:08:23] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:08:24] Speaker A: Gabriel's like, I'm not religious, though. [00:08:26] Speaker B: So Gabriel, Angel. Name Michael Angel. Name. Monica. [00:08:30] Speaker A: Not so angel. Right. [00:08:31] Speaker B: I don't think she's in the Bible. I don't know. [00:08:35] Speaker A: Are you saying Monica likes Hanukkah? [00:08:37] Speaker B: Oh, that's not what I was saying. I just don't think it's biblical. [00:08:43] Speaker A: I think Monica likes Hanukkah. And sorry for the bad joke, but it's pretty good. [00:08:47] Speaker B: No, it's great. I love it. Fun. I love it. [00:08:48] Speaker A: Okay. So of course, Gabriel's like, listen, whatever. Your quotas are down. This is a problem. It comes out that Michael. Cause we meet Michael, he just doesn't play by the rules. He's not even a century old. [00:09:07] Speaker B: No. [00:09:07] Speaker A: So that's. [00:09:08] Speaker B: Monica's got centuries on him. [00:09:10] Speaker A: Centuries. [00:09:11] Speaker B: We know this from the covered bridge. [00:09:12] Speaker A: And he doesn't even have his wings. Okay. [00:09:14] Speaker B: Which is. It's like airplane wings. It's a little gold pin that you get. They don't have the budget for angel. [00:09:20] Speaker A: Wings, so they're sort of being chastised. And this other woman comes in, and they start talking about everybody. And then somebody says, we're angels. We don't say anything bad about people or we don't gossip. [00:09:34] Speaker B: Right. [00:09:34] Speaker A: All they do is say bad things and gossip. So I was not into that. All right, so there's an award serve. [00:09:45] Speaker B: Right. [00:09:46] Speaker A: Which. [00:09:46] Speaker B: Those things are also nightmares. Like, I do not want to go to this heaven. [00:09:50] Speaker A: Thank you. An award ceremony. All right, so for the first time in centuries, Michael gets the award for most matches. [00:10:00] Speaker B: I mean, Monica's waiting for it. Oh, yeah. She's about to get out of her chair. Yes. She's wondering who knows how many years. [00:10:06] Speaker A: In a row she's been on the COVID of, like, Angel Weekly every year for centuries. And Michael has, like, you know, ba, ba, ba. He's just knocked her off her perch. But the thing about Michael's matches is they don't last. [00:10:22] Speaker B: That's right. [00:10:23] Speaker A: Right. [00:10:23] Speaker B: He makes that quota, but there's no longevity. [00:10:27] Speaker A: Yes. And then we find out that there's potential downsizes and. [00:10:34] Speaker B: But there's the Valentine's Day department and the Halloween department of connections. [00:10:40] Speaker A: Yes. [00:10:40] Speaker B: I feel like this Christian audience might be like, how are they bringing Satan's holiday into this? I'm not mad, but we might have. [00:10:48] Speaker A: To do a Halloween one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because those exist. [00:10:52] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:10:53] Speaker A: They're the same thing. There's, like, a lot of ghosts, you know, all of that. A lot of, like, going back in Time still the meet cutes. Yes. Girl. There's a whole thing. [00:11:02] Speaker B: Such a babe in the woods. [00:11:03] Speaker A: There's a whole. But doesn't the Cupid department call them, like, oh, that's what they're gonna combine. [00:11:11] Speaker B: Yeah. And they're like, how could you. Like, we are the. There's something. A Christmas connection is obviously rises above all of these other paltry holidays. This one is. [00:11:22] Speaker A: Yeah, exactly. And Gabriel takes a call from Cloudman. Like, Right. [00:11:27] Speaker B: Is this God? [00:11:29] Speaker A: So who is Cloudman on the red phone? [00:11:32] Speaker B: Why is the phone red? Nothing else is red anywhere. [00:11:35] Speaker A: And they refer to him as Cloudman, Which I was like, are they not. [00:11:39] Speaker B: Allowed to say God, man? [00:11:40] Speaker A: I don't know. That freaked me out. I was like, is he selling drugs? Like, that seemed more like. [00:11:45] Speaker B: Right. I might have a Cloudman in my cell phone. [00:11:47] Speaker A: Yeah, Cloudman. Oh, that's Cloudman making a delivery. Okay, so the cupids have to merge together to get Daisy and Patrick together by December 31st. So they give them it sometimes. [00:12:01] Speaker B: They have. Right. They give them past Christmas. They have until New Year's Eve. [00:12:04] Speaker A: Right, right. So. And Daisy and Patrick. I don't have high hopes for them, but whatever. [00:12:10] Speaker B: Patrick's a mess. I can't. No. [00:12:16] Speaker A: Talk about unfuckable. [00:12:17] Speaker B: I mean, we'll get there. Oh, my God. [00:12:19] Speaker A: Wow. [00:12:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:12:19] Speaker A: Okay, so we go to the Evergreen Cafe. Oh, and that's the other thing. Are they visible, these angels? Cause they just sort of like. [00:12:28] Speaker B: They are, though. They are and they aren't. I mean, this might be the AI Writing, like, when it's convenient. Because they get involved with humans. [00:12:34] Speaker A: Yeah. And they hold things and order things, but then they just bling out, and no one's ever. [00:12:40] Speaker B: No one really cares. Yeah. Oh, but do we say that Gabriel has forced Monica and Michael to work together? [00:12:46] Speaker A: No. Okay, so I sort of said that they have to combine. [00:12:50] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:12:51] Speaker A: They have to combine departments. And Michael and Monica have. [00:12:54] Speaker B: And they're both like, what are you. What? I work alone. I've worked alone. Blah, blah, blah. I do things differently. So, yeah, they're together. [00:13:02] Speaker A: Yes. We established that. He is a loose cannon. [00:13:06] Speaker B: Bad boy. [00:13:07] Speaker A: A bad boy. And she's by the book. All right, so we go to the Evergreen Cafe. We see Daisy and Patrick. Her method is still not working on them. And then. [00:13:20] Speaker B: Oh, my God. But wait, the coffee collision between the two angels at the. This. We have to talk about this. Where her quill. This is like, on the way to the awards ceremony or something. Michael bumps into Monica and her magical piece of dress. Quill. Gets dipped in his coffee. Maybe the only time there's ever actually been coffee in a cup in a Hallmark movie. I was like, ooh, this is different. And it's wet and it's brown. And she's like, no, it's fine. And he angels it back to life. But they have had the coffee collision that will be the subject of this movie for the humans. Yes, it happened. [00:13:51] Speaker A: There's a lot of coffee spillage in this. He sits down. Does he order a hot chocolate? And she's like, what are you doing? Yes. And she's freaked out that a he would drink hot chocolate. And not only hot chocolate, but hot chocolate with marshmallows and, like, 40,000 pounds of marshmallows. [00:14:12] Speaker B: Yeah. It would be impossible to drink this cocoa for the marshmallows. They're like. [00:14:16] Speaker A: And whipped cream. It comes out that she is. I wrote this down because this is significant. She's 587 years old, and he's only 97. [00:14:28] Speaker B: My gosh. May December. [00:14:31] Speaker A: I thought that was really interesting. First of all, those numbers were weird. 587. He's 97. We go to a Christmas market where again, Christmas market. They're gonna try to get Patrick and Daisy together. A puppy mill pops up. [00:14:49] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. A bunch of husky puppies. And Monica's sure this is gonna work. [00:14:53] Speaker A: Yep. [00:14:54] Speaker B: But she has not done her research. [00:14:55] Speaker A: No. Because Patrick. Little wimpy girly man. Patrick is allergic to dogs. [00:15:04] Speaker B: And EpiPen allergic to dogs. EpiPen allergic to dogs. I've never. I don't think that's a thing. And then he sees this puppy. Instead of getting out of the way of the puppy, stands right where he is and. And yells, shoo. [00:15:19] Speaker A: Shoo. [00:15:19] Speaker B: To this adorable. I mean, it could not be less masculine. [00:15:22] Speaker A: It's so sad. [00:15:23] Speaker B: Unfeeling. [00:15:25] Speaker A: Shoe. [00:15:25] Speaker B: Shoe. Walk away, bro. [00:15:27] Speaker A: Okay. He not only shoes, he freaks out. Yeah. He screams. [00:15:33] Speaker B: Yeah. He flails. [00:15:34] Speaker A: He flails his arms and runs around the market, burning his hand somehow. On what did he burn his hand? Like coffee? [00:15:42] Speaker B: Yeah. An urn of cocoa, I presume. But yeah. He scalds his hand. It's a disaster. [00:15:47] Speaker A: His hands. Because he's afraid of these, they get summoned back to the dcc. [00:15:51] Speaker B: Gabriel is nonplussed. [00:15:53] Speaker A: No, he is pissed. [00:15:55] Speaker B: His hair looks so good. Like, Gabriel could get it. [00:15:59] Speaker A: Gabriel could get it. By the way, I might want to play Gabriel. We'll talk about that later. [00:16:03] Speaker B: But time jumping ahead. [00:16:04] Speaker A: Yeah, Time jumping. We see surveillance video of the tender hearts. There's wreath making we hear. This is one of my favorite lines. That the bow is the soul of the wreath. [00:16:23] Speaker B: Yes. [00:16:23] Speaker A: That's very important. [00:16:25] Speaker B: It ties the whole thing together. [00:16:27] Speaker A: Exactly. Then we get a exterior of Holly Haven. It's a retirement home with, I think, like one person. [00:16:36] Speaker B: Yeah. Elaine. And she's so spry like, Elaine, girl, you don't need to be in whoever. This is criminal that she would be at home and she would walk the fuck out of there because she has everything going for her. [00:16:47] Speaker A: Not only could she walk out of there, she could dance out of there. [00:16:51] Speaker B: And we learn this. [00:16:52] Speaker A: Yeah. We learn that she's a dancer. We also learn that she's Patrick's adopted grandmother. Yeah. [00:16:58] Speaker B: Who adopted who in this scenario? [00:17:00] Speaker A: It's very weird and muddy, but I thought the same thing. Like, girl, you're fine. Like, I'm older than you. I need to be in Holly Haven. [00:17:10] Speaker B: Yeah. She looked great. [00:17:11] Speaker A: She looked great. And even she is to Patrick. [00:17:15] Speaker B: Like, what are you doing here playing chess with me? Like, get it together. Get out of the old folks home. [00:17:21] Speaker A: Yeah. Stop being a baby girl. [00:17:23] Speaker B: Stop living online. [00:17:25] Speaker A: Huh. Is he a gamer or something? [00:17:27] Speaker B: Well, he's doing research. [00:17:29] Speaker A: Oh, right. [00:17:29] Speaker B: He's doing research online. And he. Well, he follows things. He's like, this was in my feed. I hear the young folks are dancing the foxtrot. Right? And she's like, oh. She's like, do you know anything about that? She's like, honey, I won the competition. [00:17:44] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:17:44] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:17:44] Speaker A: Oh, in a petticoat. I wrote that down. I was wondering, why did I write that? Get out. Get out with the people your own age. She won it with her heels and a petticoat. [00:17:54] Speaker B: How old is this woman? No, no, I don't think she's 56. Those actors looking great. [00:17:59] Speaker A: Petticoats are like hundreds of years. [00:18:02] Speaker B: She's not an angel. She's immortal being. What's with the petticoat? [00:18:05] Speaker A: All right, so they do a Christmas fox. [00:18:05] Speaker B: She might have met a poodle skirt. [00:18:07] Speaker A: They do a Christmas foxtrot, which, by the way, is not a foxtrot, I don't think. [00:18:11] Speaker B: No, I looked up foxtrot. I was like, is this a. No, it is not. [00:18:14] Speaker A: It's not. Okay, then this is one of my favorite scenes. We cut to Daisy, who's shopping with her gay best friend. [00:18:23] Speaker B: Yes. [00:18:23] Speaker A: Okay, Hallmark, you are really giving it to us. We find out that she's a writer and she's writing a book about senior love. And she's also thinking that she should get her grandfather into this senior residence called Holly Haven't. I think you can see where this is. I think you can see where this is going. So he brings Patrick. Okay, yeah. So they're shopping. Somehow there's a Christmas flash mob. [00:18:55] Speaker B: Okay, we have to talk about the Christmas flash mob. [00:18:58] Speaker A: Help me through that I just wrote. He brings Patrick. Christmas flashback. [00:19:01] Speaker B: Yeah. So the angels, Monica and Michael are once again trying to arrange some sort of meet cute. Some sort of collision. And Daisy and Patrick are in the same place. And bad boy angel Michael is like, I know. And he uses his angel powers to start a flash mob around them, to like, push them together. But this Patrick, once again, he, like, he can't get out of a. There's plenty of space between these rows. And he cannot escape a flash mob. But then the angels get distracted. Cause they've talked about, like, dancing. Doesn't that seem. And then they join in and, oh, Monica's dancing is so tragic. And then they put it in slow motion, like it was already really difficult to watch. And then they're flash mobbing in slow motion. And somehow after this, she says, I've seen so many things. I've seen plagues, but I've never seen a Christmas flash mob. And I was like, honey, I'd rather see a plague that was so bad. [00:19:56] Speaker A: Okay, so lot to talk about here. Patrick is getting ping ponged around, basically. Cause he just can't handle anything. Daisy is into it and she's like, I don't even know. [00:20:06] Speaker B: And Daisy is so cute. [00:20:07] Speaker A: Daisy is cute, but she does the flash mob moves without knowing. Like, all of a sudden she's in it. Those two do the dancing. And then so Patrick leaves. They lose track of. [00:20:24] Speaker B: Right. Because they were swept up in love. [00:20:26] Speaker A: Yeah, they were swept up in love. And this is the first time they do their eye fucking. Right? [00:20:30] Speaker B: Oh, that look to the lower lip. Look back to the eyes. Lips, eyes, lips, eyes. [00:20:34] Speaker A: Is that a soap opera thing? [00:20:36] Speaker B: Yeah, I guess. I haven't seen many soap operas, but it's definitely a Hallmark Christmas movie thing. That's when you know it's on. I'm looking in your eyes. I'm looking at your mouth. [00:20:45] Speaker A: Got it. All right. I like that tip. I'm gonna try that with my husband. He's gonna be like, are you okay? Do you have an inner ear? Okay, so we talking about traditional ways? The granddad. Did I mention that she's writing. Oh, yeah, she's writing the book about senior love. [00:21:01] Speaker B: Yeah, Senior love. Which is like orgies in these homes. Right. If she was really researching it, that's what's happening? [00:21:06] Speaker A: Oh, that's what I wanted to say. Flash mobs are not a thing in 2025. That is like 10 or 15 a while back. Yeah. [00:21:15] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:21:16] Speaker A: So, Hall. [00:21:17] Speaker B: Bless you. You're trying to be so current. [00:21:19] Speaker A: Yes. We're just not that current. All right, so we go back to Holly Haven. The grandpa, the granddad shows up. He's like. Daisy's like, you got to give this a trial run. And he's like, this is not anybody's experience with going into a senior. No, no. People are dragged there kicking and screaming. They don't want to leave their homes. [00:21:45] Speaker B: They get there, and everyone's sedated. I mean, this is the Rosiest senior living Holly Haven. [00:21:50] Speaker A: Thank you. [00:21:50] Speaker B: It's magical. [00:21:51] Speaker A: Like, how much is rent? I am moving in. Oh, there's this. Oh, Patrick shows up. This is where it all comes down. They're talking about trees now. A Sitka. [00:22:03] Speaker B: Yeah. But wasn't this also a thing in a Royal Montana Christmas? The difference between, like, what is this? Is, like, big tree, like, is Hallmark in their pocket. And, like, you're supposed to get, like, a blue spruce is one thing, and a sitka is another. Like. [00:22:14] Speaker A: Yeah. Well, it means. It. Basically, it says, these trees mean so much to me. I know so much about them. It's the most important thing. So, yes, it is a thing. But then somebody says, I love this line. Tree SAP runs in my blood. I think Monica says that. [00:22:36] Speaker B: I think it's Patrick, because it turns out the research he's doing is on evergreen trees. And they do touch. They have like, here we go. This is gonna be it. And Daisy and Patrick touch through the pine tree needles. They touch. [00:22:51] Speaker A: And then he says, tree. Yes. It's sort of a meet cute, but. [00:22:55] Speaker B: Not quite, because also, the angels get distracted by an employee. [00:22:59] Speaker A: Okay, we're gonna talk about that. Okay. All right, so you're right. Okay. So it's a blue spruce or a Sitka. They have the touch. He says, tree SAP runs in my blood. And she says, that must be sticky. I love that line. Yes. Daisy, get it. [00:23:17] Speaker B: Go ahead, Daisy. [00:23:18] Speaker A: Okay. And you're right. There is a sort of Instagram moment where they're together, and this crazy kid that works there with a camera is like, you know, you're under the mistletoe, right? And they're like, what? Huh? So they, you know. Yes. They look up, camera comes out, they're under it. Nobody knows what to do. [00:23:36] Speaker B: I mean, I did think this was actually a little bit legitimately comedic. Okay, we'll do the kissing. We'll do kiss. I mean, their inability to say, well, we'll kiss. We'll do the kissing. I thought that was actually, we'll make kiss happen. [00:23:54] Speaker A: Yeah, but the kid is like, well, you know, I'm gonna lose my job if you don't kiss. You better kiss. You better put those lips together. You better. You better see tongues. [00:24:01] Speaker B: My mom is gonna be on the street. Yeah. He is really gunning for this. [00:24:04] Speaker A: Like, really. [00:24:06] Speaker B: I mean, spoiler alert. But did Gabriel send him? Oh, I mean. [00:24:12] Speaker A: Oh, girl, you are giving a spoiler. [00:24:15] Speaker B: Sorry. I mean. [00:24:17] Speaker A: All right. So they're all confused. They end up back in the clouds. The friend is like, listen, just go for a jog. Clear your mind. And this is when it gets really trippy. This is like mushroom ecstasy trippy. This is mdm. [00:24:34] Speaker B: Once again, I was like, we're in heaven and the clouds go for a jog. That's a no. Like, I do not want to go to this place. That's what you're gonna do in the clouds. You're not gonna float around and whatever. You're gonna go for a jog. [00:24:45] Speaker A: That's why heaven sucks. I think I even wrote, you still have to exercise, right? [00:24:50] Speaker B: No. [00:24:51] Speaker A: There's a gym in the sky with no equipment, though. It's just the clouds and a really weird green screen. [00:24:59] Speaker B: So weird. It's like a Lisa Frank unicorn background. Like a Trapper Keeper from the. Like, all the colors and. Yeah. [00:25:07] Speaker A: So she's jogging, and then, of course. [00:25:09] Speaker B: She'S, like, yogaing a little bit. [00:25:11] Speaker A: She's. Yeah, right. She's doing. Yes. Warrior pose. You're right, right, right. And then he comes in, by the way, they're in, like, sweats, but it's white. [00:25:20] Speaker B: Yeah. She's like, ugh. I booked the cloud because there's a finite space that you have to make a Raymond Heaven. [00:25:32] Speaker A: Heaven sucks. You have to work and go to the gym. It's terrible. All right. It gets revealed somehow that Michael has never had a snowball fight. [00:25:44] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:25:45] Speaker A: But this. [00:25:46] Speaker B: He's like, don't you wish we sometimes could do the things that they do? And she's already expressed an interest in dancing. And they did dance. [00:25:52] Speaker A: Right. [00:25:52] Speaker B: She's like, what kind of things? And he's like, the things that you need a partner for. And then there's a sense. She's like, like, what? [00:25:59] Speaker A: Like what? [00:25:59] Speaker B: He's like, snowball fight. [00:26:01] Speaker A: Yes. [00:26:02] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:26:03] Speaker A: The lead up to that was really. And can I tell you something? I was like, he's gonna say snowball Fight. [00:26:10] Speaker B: You knew it. [00:26:10] Speaker A: I did know it. I don't know how I thought it. [00:26:13] Speaker B: Was gonna be dancing. I knew you knew it was gonna be fucking snowball fights. [00:26:17] Speaker A: Yeah. And that's where I don't understand these angels. She's whatever, 600 years old. He's 100 years old. They can hold hot chocolate, but they. I just don't get what they're. Why are they limits? [00:26:28] Speaker B: Right. [00:26:29] Speaker A: Yeah. Nothing makes sense. Why are they dead? Are they dead? [00:26:34] Speaker B: Right. [00:26:34] Speaker A: All right, so we. Oh, this is good. We time travel now. We go back to the great, great, great grandparents. I think of Patrick. [00:26:44] Speaker B: Patrick. [00:26:45] Speaker A: And we see that Monica has been guiding these tender hearts for centuries. [00:26:53] Speaker B: Right. It's like their souls through time. But is this not. It's like their families have a connection. I'm like, this could get dodgy with the gene pools. I was. It was a little unclear to me how they've been moving through time and I guess just never making the connection. But the album has, like. And this is also where we learned that Elaine was a chess. Like a world chess champion, but she traded children for trophies. [00:27:18] Speaker A: Yes. [00:27:18] Speaker B: And we're supposed to applaud that. And I'm horrified. [00:27:21] Speaker A: Correct. And by the way, she's still playing chess. She's always playing chess. [00:27:24] Speaker B: Yes. [00:27:25] Speaker A: Yeah. So clearly she can't let it go. Then we get into this stalk. I called it a stalker montage, where she's, like, stalking tender hearts through centuries, space and time with that same quill pen. I don't know why. [00:27:38] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:27:40] Speaker A: Okay. This is where it gets dicey. Gabriel calls the angels into the boardroom to tell them it's time to speed it up. All is lost if they don't make this connection now by Christmas because. [00:27:56] Speaker B: Because of something about how long through time all is lost. [00:28:00] Speaker A: All of these connections are going. The tender hearts are gonna just lose their mind. There's gonna be. They should turn into zombies. That would be great. [00:28:09] Speaker B: Right? Yes. Steaks. I would love some more steaks. [00:28:12] Speaker A: Steaks. Let's do a Hallmark holiday. [00:28:15] Speaker B: Vampires. [00:28:16] Speaker A: Let's do a Hallmark holiday movie that is part this and part horror. Zombie. [00:28:22] Speaker B: I'm so in. [00:28:23] Speaker A: Okay. We're doing that IP Known here. Okay. We go. We go back to the old folks home, the young folks home, where horny seniors gather. The grandparents are obviously getting together. This is Nathan and Elaine. They really have a connection. [00:28:42] Speaker B: They're so perfect for each other. [00:28:43] Speaker A: They're really, really perfect for each other. [00:28:46] Speaker B: He's never gonna beat her in chess, but he has other qualities she enjoys. [00:28:49] Speaker A: Right. Then we Go to a restaurant where Daisy and the gay boy, her best friend. [00:28:58] Speaker B: And they're sitting at the bar. [00:28:59] Speaker A: They're sitting at the bar and the gay kid is like, oh, I just wanna meet somebody. Or he's going there to meet somebody. [00:29:07] Speaker B: No, someone he was talking to online. This is our Grindr moment. Happens to walk in to the restaurant, and he looks up and he recognizes this man, even with his pants on, who is not really a match for our. [00:29:23] Speaker A: Okay, so much to say. So we're forgetting that Michael and Monica's friend, the one with too much makeup and the hair, she actually makes that happen because she walks by and throws a little. [00:29:35] Speaker B: Oh, that was her project. Those were her tender hearts. [00:29:38] Speaker A: Yes. [00:29:38] Speaker B: Okay. She's on gay detail. That's cute. [00:29:41] Speaker A: All right, so this dude walks in. This is the most unfortunate looking man. [00:29:46] Speaker B: And he doesn't. He didn't look gay to me. [00:29:49] Speaker A: He doesn't look gay. [00:29:50] Speaker B: I mean. Or he's married for 20 years gay. [00:29:53] Speaker A: Thank you. If he came up on Grindr, I would be like, no block. Or whatever they do. [00:29:58] Speaker B: Poor baby. [00:29:59] Speaker A: And he's like, that's the guy I've been talking to. Well, go. What are you waiting for? And then we never see him again. Yeah. Okay. So that was there. They show up in their ugly sweaters, Monica and Michael, and somehow. Oh, no, sorry. Daisy and Patrick show up in their ugly Christmas sweaters. And he inexplicably falls into a Christmas tree. When they're forced to do karaoke. [00:30:27] Speaker B: Yeah. And the angels are really. They're like, I know what to do. We'll have someone announce that you like A Christmas Carol with a live guitarist. The Other angel must be sung by. Let's see. Daisy and Patrick, which, in what? You didn't put your name in the hat? And then there's this moment of panic. Cause Daisy's sitting at the bar and Patrick's sitting at a table, like. And then Monica's. Is it her inspo? She's like, I know we're Daisy and Patrick, but we gotta get the other Daisy and Patrick up on stage. [00:30:55] Speaker A: Right. [00:30:55] Speaker B: And once again, Patrick proves to just be so utterly inept at moving through space. It's. [00:31:03] Speaker A: It's just. [00:31:04] Speaker B: I can't think that Daisy would ever. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. [00:31:08] Speaker A: He falls into a Christmas tree. As often, you will see this in many of them. And this is when it gets dicey. Gabriel is pissed now. Pissed. He summons them back to the dcc. The Cloudman is pissed. [00:31:23] Speaker B: Yeah. This is just not working. [00:31:24] Speaker A: This is just not working. He wants answers. Monica is under review, which I love. [00:31:31] Speaker B: How the mighty have fallen. [00:31:32] Speaker A: Oh, girl. And Michael gives up his wings. So Monica, I think she storms out. [00:31:37] Speaker B: She storms out. But she then is coming back. And she comes back just in time to hear Michael say, some angels just aren't up to the job. Some angels don't deserve their wings. And then that's all she hears. She's like, he's shit talking me. And she storms off. And then he takes his own wings off and sets them on the table. [00:31:56] Speaker A: Exactly. So he's actually protecting her. She thinks he. He's being conniving and calculating. [00:32:01] Speaker B: Who did they put on the job? They put this other, like, Halloween department angel. [00:32:04] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. So Monica is like, I'm not gonna do this. I'm gonna go back to earth. I'm gonna finally order a hot chocolate because I want to see what it's all about. Yeah. [00:32:18] Speaker B: She's like, I need a pint of ice cream. This is bad. [00:32:21] Speaker A: She breaks down inexplicably. Elaine can see her, who is, of course, playing chess in the cafe. [00:32:28] Speaker B: In the cafe. And these are her first tears in 587 years. We are meant to understand. [00:32:33] Speaker A: Thank you. She's got dry eye. Clearly she needs that Jennifer Aniston stuff. All right, so she goes to church, and lo and behold, Michael is there. And they all realize this was just a miscommunication, like they talked it out. [00:32:49] Speaker B: She's like, how dare you say what you said? He's like, look, I gave up my wings. [00:32:53] Speaker A: And she's like, you did? [00:32:54] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:32:54] Speaker A: And they realize they really are in this together and that they both made a mistake. We go back to Holly Haven. It's a Christmas tree that doesn't sled. What does that mean? I have no idea. [00:33:09] Speaker B: Shed. [00:33:10] Speaker A: It's a Christmas tree that doesn't shed. [00:33:12] Speaker B: Yes. Which is the research that Patrick has been doing on his phone this whole. [00:33:15] Speaker A: Time on this genus. So it's revealed that his research is all about Christmas trees and developing a Christmas tree that doesn't shed needles, by the way. Brilliant. [00:33:27] Speaker B: I mean, yeah, I would buy it. [00:33:28] Speaker A: I would buy it. And I would also, like that. Almost made him fuckable. You know what I mean? [00:33:33] Speaker B: Like, okay, well, she has brains. Yeah. [00:33:38] Speaker A: Daisy comes by, of course, to drop off presents. He finally sees her. Patrick takes off his glasses. She sees him. Finally. These two tender hearts have had their moment. [00:33:53] Speaker B: He goes to help her with the presents, the graphics, the sparkle. Sparkles are sparkling. [00:33:58] Speaker A: Yep. So we know that those two tender hearts Are good. They did it by Christmas. They did what they're supposed to do. It's a miracle. I don't think downsizing is happening. By the way, Patrick should keep his glasses on because he looks better with the glasses. [00:34:12] Speaker B: 100%. [00:34:13] Speaker A: Right? Right. [00:34:13] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:34:14] Speaker A: Poor Patrick. [00:34:14] Speaker B: I know. [00:34:15] Speaker A: All right. We end up back at the bridge where it all started. I'm gonna let you take us out. She surprises him with something. So she's at the bridge waiting. Or is he? She. [00:34:30] Speaker B: It's Monica's place where she goes to reflect. So she's at the bridge reflecting. You know, you're gonna have to help me here, babe. [00:34:38] Speaker A: She surprises him with a snowball fight. [00:34:40] Speaker B: Oh, of course. [00:34:42] Speaker A: The snowball fight. [00:34:43] Speaker B: He never had and always long for the sex coded. Snowball fight. Yeah. [00:34:52] Speaker A: They explain something. [00:34:53] Speaker B: Gabriel shows up to be like, you guys thought you were connecting the tenderhearts, which was important, or else all would be lost. But the whole time, I was making the match that really mattered. The match between you two angels. [00:35:07] Speaker A: Exactly. And they explain a feeling that's a flutter. They both have it. Gabriel, who looks good on Earth, by the way. He looks good in having a hair. Oh, yeah. [00:35:19] Speaker B: No, he looks good. That hair again. [00:35:22] Speaker A: They become one. They dance on the bridge. They finally kiss. They are two hearts beating as one. And that is the end of a Christmas angel match. All right, so lots to unpack here. First of all, my favorite question. Would you fuck either of these two? [00:35:46] Speaker B: No, I would not. Would you? [00:35:49] Speaker A: No. She's too boring, and he's just. [00:35:53] Speaker B: And just when she. If she could groove a little bit. She's not unattractive. But the dancing, I couldn't. I could never. I can't recover from that. [00:36:00] Speaker A: Yeah. He just didn't do it for me. Like, I don't buy the bad boy thing. [00:36:05] Speaker B: No, he's too doofy. [00:36:06] Speaker A: Right. Plus, he's only 97, and I. You know, you have to be at least 200 for me to ride this, right? [00:36:11] Speaker B: Yeah, I hear that. [00:36:12] Speaker A: You have to be at least 200. Who would you play in this movie? [00:36:18] Speaker B: I think the Unhinged Christmas Tree Farm employee. [00:36:23] Speaker A: The photographer? [00:36:24] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:36:25] Speaker A: That's who I wanted to play. [00:36:26] Speaker B: Are you serious? [00:36:27] Speaker A: Yes. [00:36:27] Speaker B: Oh. [00:36:28] Speaker A: Oh, honey, I would. [00:36:29] Speaker B: But also, Gabriel is up there for me, and you said the same thing, but I think those guys are in cahoots. [00:36:35] Speaker A: Well, Gabriel, I liked him on paper, but to play. I want to play that photographer. [00:36:41] Speaker B: I want to play the photographer, too. [00:36:43] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. It was just so, like. Kiss her. Kiss her. [00:36:45] Speaker B: Yeah. Kiss. Let's go. Puck her up. [00:36:47] Speaker A: I'm gonna see. Okay. So, yeah, that's who I would play. What did they get right? What did they get wrong? [00:36:55] Speaker B: So I said this in the beginning, but I do. And that very Hallmark or the angels are saying it's the devious DMs. Those devious DMs are keeping these real world connections from happening. But I have to say, there's something about that plot line I like. Like, I met my husband in a bar the way God intended. [00:37:14] Speaker A: Thank you. [00:37:14] Speaker B: You know, I never used those devices. And I have to say, I look down a little bit. You know, it's like, how did grandpa meet Grandma? Well, you know, he came back from the war and she helped him recover. And how did mom meet dad? Well, he was a band nerd, actually, and she was a cheerleader, but they fell in love. How did you meet our dad? I ordered him like a pizza. You know what I mean? It's just there's like not as much romance. And so I thought that they. I kind of think they got that right. I liked that. [00:37:42] Speaker A: Okay, I agree with you. I think they did get the whole technology thing down, that it is causing misconnections. I agree with you 100%. What I think they got wrong in this was the convoluted. Like, I just didn't understand why they. [00:38:00] Speaker B: Were angels, what it means to be an angel. Can you drink cocoa? Can you not drink cocoa? And then at the end, like the movie could have had this. If we want to fall in love, we have to not be in heaven anymore. But it turns out angels could be fucking this whole time. [00:38:14] Speaker A: Yes. [00:38:15] Speaker B: Confusing. [00:38:16] Speaker A: Very confusing. [00:38:16] Speaker B: Because, like, oh, you've made this match. So, like, what? [00:38:18] Speaker A: Yeah, you could be rolling around the clouds fucking, instead of. [00:38:22] Speaker B: This whole time you could have been doing that. [00:38:23] Speaker A: Yeah, that didn't work for me. And I just didn't understand, like, if they were visible, if they weren't, if they were like, I just. That part I didn't get. So that was my sort of down, downgrade for this. But I think all in all a very timely. Except for the flash mob Hallmark Christmas movie. [00:38:43] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:38:44] Speaker A: Well, that's it for a Christmas angel match. Please, please, please. If you have any questions, comments, want to tell us what to watch, email me at Label QueenPotgmail.com. until then, until next time. See ya. [00:38:57] Speaker B: Hallmark hoes fa la la Sam.